Hey Reader!

So, I have this one annoying coworker.

Ok, obviously I've had several annoying coworkers over the years. I could tell you stories! But I won’t, because what if through some insane twist of fate they read this and recognize themselves?

Which, on one hand, would serve them right? But on the other would make me feel like a jerk.

I mean, I could bring up the behavior that bugs me so much. What is it that keeps me silent when frankness might help?

Several things jump to mind.

1. They will absolutely deny ever engaging in infuriating behavior.
2. They will admit to said behavior, but have an excuse for every instance.
3. They will turn the tables and tell me that I’m insufferable.
4. They’ll yell at me. Unlikely, but possible. I don’t like being yelled at!

Sometimes I’m a scaredy cat. Also, I’ve been socialized to smooth things over, to placate.​

When a colleague's behavior makes me crazy, I think, ‘I'm going to say something.’ Either to the person or, in extreme instances, to the person’s boss.

But then I decide it’s not as bad as I thought, it’s not going to help, it’s just going to sow discord.

Now, lest you think I’m a total pushover, I can be tough when it suits me.

Once I told an unpleasant business associate, “In this conversation you have questioned my honesty, my integrity, and my commitment to the mission.”

My colleague in the next cubicle looked at me with the widest eyes I’ve ever seen.

There’s something about the work environment. I just want it to be easy, you know? I don’t want to argue, I want to get along with everyone, I want as much peace and ease as possible.

Once upon a time I assumed that adults acted like, well, adults. That in the workplace people were polite and did what was expected and always acted with integrity.

The biggest surprise I encountered when I hit my thirties was that people just are who they are. Age may mellow us, but it doesn’t change us.

The drama queens still stir $#!t up. The whiners still complain endlessly. And the clueless continue to resist the idea that they are not at the center of the universe.*

Somehow I thought age would confer social responsibility and, I guess, a certain amount of decorum. What a disappointment to realize the truth.

Still, good communication helps, and if I’m not always great about telling people that I’m dissatisfied with their conduct, I’m terrific at praising the behavior I’d like to see.

​And I believe in setting expectations.

As a parent who has made her fair share of mistakes, I also recognize that many of the things my kids do well they do because we expected it of them.

Manners, great work ethic, eating what’s served to them, respect for people and planet; these are not just values but standards. I believe that people will rise to the occasion if you let them know what you expect of them.

Mostly. 😁

You can let your email audience know what you expect of them, and what they can expect of you, too.

You’ll deliver entertaining and educational content at prescribed intervals. In return, they'll follow your links to blog posts, podcast episodes, offers, and anything else you deem helpful.

This is why it’s important to include a call to action in every email. It doesn’t have to be something they pay for, but it should get them into the habit of clicking on the links you provide.

Of course you’ve got to make sure you’re directing them to good stuff, or they’ll stop trusting your recommendations.

People are reading our emails because we’re offering them things they want and need. So let’s make sure we’re giving them lots of both.

That said, do you want help making your own email more entertaining, educational, or lucrative? I’ve got you. Grab a spot on my calendar and let’s see how I can help.

xo, Julia

PS - Too many links? You tell me.

*Obviously I’m using the term ‘clueless’ as a stand-in for obnoxious, egocentric, narcissistic, psychopathic, etc.

​Alphaville knows that we can’t really stay young forever, and so does this email. Forward it to someone who’s aging gracefully.

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